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From: ????????????????????????
Subject: Pipes Digest #64 - September 7, 1991

		 Pipes Digest #64 - September 7, 1991

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From: ?????????????????????
Subject: Has anybody seen John Cotton's #1 or #1&2 ?

Greetings, fellow puffers.

I have a question about a brand of tobacco that I greatly enjoyed 
years ago: John Cotton's.  I used to be about to find Cotton's #1
(a mild English) and #1&2 Medium (a medium English) in smokeshops
everywhere, but I haven't seen it in years.  Does anyone know of
a store that still carries this stuff?  Or has it gone out of

It's one of my all-time favorites.  The #1 was an especially delightful 
after-breakfast tobacco.

Steve Houser

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From: ??????????????????????? (Robert Whitehead)
Subject: The Conversion Factor

The Conversion Factor
(or How I Got My Roommate To Give Up Cigarettes)

During my freshman year of college, I moved into the dorm with a
cigarette chainsmoker named Carl Michael Allen.  (Only guy with
three first names I ever met!)

Carl could never understand why I smoked a pipe.  "Why bother?" he'd
ask.  "Look at all the trouble you have to go through for a smoke. 
You gotta have the pipe; you gotta have matches; you gotta have a
pipe nail, a dottle pick, a pipe rag, a tobacco pouch, and so forth.
I can have a smoke any time I want, and all I need is a lighter. 
Besides, if you run out of tobacco, you have to wait for the tobacco
shop to open; I can go to the streetcorner and drop $1.25 into the
cigarette machine for my favorite brand!"

Of course, I rallied my defenses quickly.  "Sure, Carl, smoking a
pipe is a little more trouble, but I think it's worth it.  In the
first place, not everyone can stand the smell of cigarette smoke. 
That's because cigarettes contain stale, dry tobacco that's been
impregnated with phosphorous to keep it burning.  You set a lit
cigarette down in an ashtray, it burns itself to the end of the
filter; that's tantamount to a tear gas grenade.  But how many times
have you heard someone say, 'I love the smell of a pipe; it's so
much nicer than cigarettes'?

"Another good thing about pipes:  as you smoke a pipe, it gets
better and better as it breaks in.  There's no challenge to smoking
cigarettes, and it takes no skill at all to light up.  Pipes make
you work for the burn, but the rewards are worth ten times the

"Pipe tobacco (that you get fresh from the tobacconists, not the
smunge you get at KMart) is pure, except for the flavorings that are
put in some blends.  Even the flavors are pure:  vanilla, rum,
cognac, cherry, apple, and so forth.  Since the tobacco is pure, it
won't sustain a burn:  you have to keep smoking a pipe, or it'll go
out.  Saves on tobacco if it doesn't keep burning."

Soon, Carl began to see the light.  I even loaded my favorite pipe
with my favorite blend and let him smoke it.  With his first puff,
he was sold; he'd never had such a smooth smoke from a Marlboro!

To complete the conversion, I splurged and bought him a coachman's
pipe with the extra stem lengthener, a pipe nail, and two ounces of
The Tinder Box's V.S.O.P. blend.  I showed him how to break in the
briar, how to pack, how to light, all the time knowing how my Dad
must have felt when he taught me how to shoot.  I felt part of

Soon, Carl and his pipe were inseperable.  I'd come back to the room
between classes and find him stretched out on his bed, his pipe bowl
nestled on his chest, his eyes closed and a look of sheer angelic
bliss plastered on his puss.  Occasionally, he'd open one eye and
cuss me, tongue firmly in cheek, for getting him started on pipes.

"I can't get through the day without coming back to the room, lying
down, and smoking this damned thing!" he wailed.  "Beats driving
everyone else out of the room with those coffin nails you *used* to
smoke," I retorted.  "You got that right," Carl finally admitted.

Christmas rolled around.  Carl had cast longing looks at my
meerschaum-capped Calabash pipe I had bought and with which I had
fallen in love, so before he left for his hometown of Drasco,
Arkansas, I purchased an identical pipe for him.  Needless to say,
Carl was stunned when he unwrapped the pipe and pouch of Aalborg
tobacco he'd found on his desk.

I guess you could say my roommate and I were good friends from then

Time passed; Carl completed his studies and was graduated from
Samford as a summa cum laude Accounting student.  I left Samford and
went on to Auburn to carry on the tradition, then went to Air Force
Basic Training in April of 1980.

I haven't heard from Carl Michael Allen since 1979; I understand he
is a bank accountant in Little Rock, Arkansas.  If anyone on the
list is from the Little Rock area, and perhaps know of Carl's
whereabouts, please pass along my regards.

And, in the words of our esteemed moderator,

Smoke in peace!
| Robert C. Whitehead       |
| Intergraph Corporation    | You know how it is when you go to be the
| Mapping Sciences Division | subject of a psychology experiment, and
| Technical Documentation   | nobody else shows up, and you think maybe
| Mailpath: b17a!medrcw!bob | that's part of the experiment?  I'm like
| Phone: (205)730-1923      | that all the time.
>From the Real World: ????????????????????????

"I think they're going to take all this money that we spend now on war
and death -- "
"And make them spend it on life."
    -- Edith Keeler and Kirk, "The City on the Edge of Forever,"
       Stardate unknown

[ Thanks for the story, Bob! Hope some of our mbrs. in college can do
the same. -S. ]

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From: Steve Masticola (???????????????????????)
Subject: Renting & puffing

From time to time, I scan the ``Rentals to Share'' ads in the
newspapers, and see a lot of ads for nonsmokers only. Now, I have
nothing against those folks, but I'd certainly appreciate knowing when
I was welcome in a place, as well as when I was unwelcome (as one
poster ad made clear with the suffix, "This means YOU, butthead!" How
bigoted! How unkind!)

Therefore, I'd like you to think about the following. If you have an
apartment for rent, or to share, why not advertise it as ``Pipe smoker
welcome'' ? What could be frendlier, and more in keeping with the
spirit of camraderie among pipe people?

And, after your tenant moves in, you will be secure in the knowledge
that he or she will be quiet, clean, and timely with the rent payments
(as all pipe smokers are :-) Knowing this, you can relax and

						Smoke in peace,
						~\U Steve.

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 )				       *   *				  )
( Pipe smokers will rule the world!      *   ??????????????????????	 (
 ) (if they don't run out of matches...) *   Steve Masticola, moderator	  )
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Article Index

  1. Subject: Pipes Digest #64 - September 7, 1991
  2. Subject: Has anybody seen John Cotton's #1 or #1&2 ?
  3. Subject: The Conversion Factor
  4. Subject: Renting & puffing
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